


Necessary

by welcometothefangirlparade



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: 4x11 speculation, Angst, Bellamy Blake needs a hug, Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin Angst, F/M, Guilt, I don't ship bellarke but this should happen anyway, Marcus Kane (mentioned) - Freeform, Someone needs to call Clarke out on her bullshit, bellarke angst, guilty bellamy, independent bellamy, octavia blake (mentioned) - Freeform, platonic bellarke - Freeform, stop trying to be god Clarke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-07
Updated: 2017-05-07
Packaged: 2018-10-29 04:59:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10846959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/welcometothefangirlparade/pseuds/welcometothefangirlparade
Summary: "what are you doing?""What I have to. Like always."





	Necessary

Bellamy was pissed. He didn't have to say anything. The pacing and his deadly glare spoke for themselves. Clarke hated seeing him like this, but she did what she had to do, right? The save the human race, this was the only way.

"I'm opening that door," Bellamy growled.

"No, you're staying here," Clarke argued.

"You can't expect me to stay down here not knowing what happened to my sister."

Clarke's jaw tensed. "I'm not letting you go out there. You're staying in this bunker and that's final."

Bellamy swallowed, and bit his lip. He stared at Clarke for a moment and all she saw in his face was disappointment and betrayal. "I'm opening that door," he said again, this time much more calmly. "And to stop me, you're going to have to kill me."

Jaha's head snapped up at that. "We aren't killing anyone," he said. "Because no one is going anywhere."

"Try me."

He walked out of the room, without look back.

"Bellamy wait!"

She ran out behind him, only to discover he had disappeared behind a sea of people. She sigh, and took a deep breath.

"He'll come around," Jaha tried to reassure her. "He will."

Clarke shook her head. She knew Bellamy. He wouldn't stop until everyone was in this bunker. "He won't."

\---------------

Bellamy was mad, but not nearly mad as he felt betrayed. He didn't want to believe it was Clarke's idea, but he knew. And it hurt him to know that this wasn't even unusual for her. She would do anything to protect her people, even if it meant killing the rest of humanity.

But he didn't only feel betrayed by the cheating. It was Octavia. He knew Clarke wouldn't do this if she had believed Octavia could pull through. He had. And that meant she had as little faith in him, as he did his sister. That stung.

He didn't have a plan. He never did. He was just going in. Octavia was out there, and he wasn't going to let her die like that after she had fought for them.

There was always the nagging thought in the back of his head, that wondered if she wasn't up there. If Luna, or Roan, had taken the victory. He tried to push the thought out of his mind. He believed that she could win, but it terrified him to think that she couldn't. And it terrified him that he had any doubt in her at all.

Bellamy knew what Octavia was capable of. If she had survived a stab wound, and a fall from at least one hundred feet, she could survive this.

It wasn't reassuring. But it kept him going. If not for Octavia, for the other people. For Kane, and everyone else left outside to perish. They deserved the bunker much more than Skaikru had. Much more than Bellamy had himself.

As much as he hated it, he was a murderer. He killed that army, the army sent to help him, and a murderer had no place in the bunker. If it were anyone who deserved to perish in that radiation, it was him.

Bellamy had hoped to forget about his guilt after he and Jasper had been able to talk. And for a while, he could. But no number of drinks and parties would be able to let him forget about the shit decisions he'd made. He could excuse them as being for Clarke's leave, or Pike's manipulation, but it wasn't. He couldn't because he knew that in reality, it was not them. He made those decisions, and he didn't deserve to be pardoned for that.

He pushed open the last door. In front of him was a staircase, and above that, the door.

He wasn't going to let anyone else pay for his actions, for his mistakes.

\---------------

Clarke knew where he was going. No doubt he was going to open the doors. He'd made that clear when he'd told them that the only way to stop him was to kill him. She brought a gun with her, tucked into her back pocket, but had no intention of actually using it.

She pushed open the door to the exit of the bunker, where Bellamy stood only a few feet away.

"You can't do this," she warned, letting the door slam behind her.

"You're not stopping me from doing this Clarke."

"You open that door, you're asking for death."

"I had to!" Clarke yelled, "I had to. I had no other choice!"

"That choice wasn't for you to make," Bellamy retorted angrily.

"If you hadn't gone down in that arena none of this would have happened! You gave me no choice but to do that."

"This is not on me, Princess," he snapped. "Echo was cheating. She was going to kill Octavia, and you just expected me to sit and do nothing? Do you know me at all?"

"Bell-"

"Save it Griffin."

"Let me help."

"I think you've done enough, _Wanheda_."

The name hit Clarke like a brick. He had never opted to call Clarke "Wanheda", when everyone else had. He always called her Clarke, or princess. A wave of guilt washed over her, but only for a moment. Being guilt ridden was weak, and she couldn't be weak now. She couldn't let him go through with this.

"If I can't go, then you're not going either." Clarke regretted the words as soon as they had come out of her mouth.

"Really? An ultimatum?" He let out a bitter laugh. "That door is opening, whether you like it or not."

He made a dash for the stairs leading to the door. Clarke wrapped her fingers around the cool object in her back pocket, and rose her hands.

"What are you doing?" His voice was steady, but completely unsure.

"What I have to. Like _always_. You aren't leaving. Once those doors open, we're dead. Those people will be mad, and then it won't matter who has the bunker. I did what was necessary for survival. For our people."

He just shook his head. "Could you be anymore selfish? Clarke, my sister is up there-"

"What if she's not?"

"She is. I know she is because I have faith in her."

"Octavia is strong, but the others-"

"You never thought she could win, did you? You had this whole plan premeditated before she even left."

"Bellamy-"

He shot her a look. A look of hurt, anger, and betrayal. Just like he had when he discovered what she'd done. "This would be the second time you've left my sister for dead to save your own ass," he hissed. "I'm not about to leave her up there after she fought to the death for us."

"I'm sorry, okay?" Clarke pleaded. "I just, I didn't have another option. If Luna won, we'd all be dead. You need to see that."

"Maybe that would have been for the best."

Clarke stood speechless for a minute. Unable to comprehend what had just come out of Bellamy's mouth. She lowered the hand with the gun in it.

"What-what do you mean?"

"I mean, you cheated, Clarke. None of us in this bunker deserve to be here."

"We found this bunker, we deserve a place in it."

"Not anymore."

"Why are you doing this, Bell?" She asked. "Why?"

"What happened to not caring who survived, as long as the human race did, huh?" He retorted, completely ignoring her own question. "What makes us so much better than the other clans? Because from where I stand, we're not better. In fact, we're worse. Everything we have done was never for their benefit, it was always only for us. When did we become the mountain men? Clarke?"

"I did it because of Luna!"

"We wouldn't have to worry about Luna if you hadn't taken her bone marrow to turn yourself into a nightblood!"

"How did you-"

"Your mom told me," he interrupted. "So you were just going to cheat your way into becoming the next commander too?"

"That's not what it's like Bellamy! I had to-"

He just shook his head, in disbelief. "Just stop. Stop saying that. It doesn't justify anything. It doesn't excuse what you've been doing."

"I'm sorry, is that what you want to hear? I'm sorry! I didn't know what to do. This was the only logical option!"

Her voice cracked, and she could almost feel tears brim at her eyes. She couldn't let him do this. She couldn't lose him. Not yesterday, not today, and not ever. She raised her arm, pointing to gun at him again.

"If you take one more step, I won't hesitate to pull the trigger."

"I told you, that if you wanted to stop me, you'd have to kill me. So do it."

"What?"

"Shoot me."

Clarke's hand wavered slightly.

"I would rather die here trying to save the people, than live knowing that I was the cause of hundreds more deaths."

Clarke shook her head numbly. She thought she could do it, but looking at his face, she couldn't. She couldn't do it.

"Put the gun down and let me open the door."

"I can't do that. We will die, if those doors open. If not by the people, than the radiation."

Bellamy clenched his jaw. "Let. Me. Go."

"I can't, I can't. It's not safe..."

"Those people are dying because of you, Clarke. Let me open the door. I'm not having anyone else's death be because of me. I'm tired of feeling guilty because I know I was the reason for so many deaths. If my sister, Kane, or anyone else dies because I couldn't do anything to save them, I might as well be good as dead too."

"Bellamy stop, please, just stop!"

She dropped the gun, and it clattered to the floor.

"Please, I don't-I can't lose you, I can't. I brought you back because I can't-I cant just live in a world without you. I need you."

"Then open the damn door, Clarke. Please."

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> So, yeah I'm pissed at clarke Griffin right now. She needs to stop acting like god and pull her shit together. Yeah if Luna won than no one would survive, but that whole conversation with Roan was bullshit. She showed zero faith in Octavia, left her and Kane out to die, and pulls a fucking gun on Bellamy, the person she kidnapped because she couldn't live without him.
> 
> STOP ROMANTICIZING THAT!!! It is not romantic in anyway. Yes she can't live without him, BUT PULLING A GUN ON SOMEONE IS NOT ROMANTIC WHATSOEVER. Like Bellamy handcuffing her was not romantic at all. Holding someone hostage IS NOT ROMANTIC. Especially if it's the second time they've left the persons sibling to die. 
> 
> Anyway, I'm hoping that Octavia knows Bellamy wasn't part of taking the bunker. I'm also hoping that she apologizes for unfairly abusing him. But I'm glad we got some reconciliation. While it wasn't obvious, you could see it was there. When Bellamy said he was the lucky sibling, you could see the change in Octavia's facial expression, as well as her knowing when Bellamy wanted to say something and taking his advice. He ultimately saved her life. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed! Can't wait until next Wednesday!


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